New Funny Sms

<(-.-)> Chingu
<(‘.’)> Pingu
<(*_*)> Mingu
Kya ye bacche apke hai,
Ager nahi to aage bhejdo,
Jiske honge rakh lega,
Surat mil rahi thi to lga apke honge!

Teacher: Galti hone pe maafi magne wale ko kya kahte hai?
Stud: Samajhdar
Teacher: Aur galti na hone pe bhi mafi mangne waale ko kya kahte hai?
Stud: BOYFRIEND

Baap ne bete ki talahshi li
Cigrate Beer or Gals k No. nikle
Baap ne bahut mara, pucha kb se Chal rha h sab?
Beta (rote hue) – Papa ye jacket to apki hai

Baithe tere khayalo me, kore kagaz pe likha tera naam… Tasvir bhi bana dali aur likha ye Paigam..
‘Zinda ya murda, pakadne vale ko 5000 nagad inam…

Rok Do Mere JanaZe Ko ZaLimo,Rok Do Mere JanaZe Ko ZaLimo,
Mujh Mein JaaN aa Gai Hai,
PeeChe Mur K Dekho KaMeeNo,
CiGeratte Ki DuKaan aaGai Hai….

Teri pyari surat pe dil harun,
Teri har jaroorat pe jaan varun,
Jab bhi sochoon teri harkatoon ke bare mein toh,
Dil kare tere kaan ke neeche do marun.

Kehte hai 1000 saal pehle
Husn aur Mohabat apas mei dost the.
Ek raat dono sath baithe the k itne mai chand nikl aya.
Mohabat ne chand ki taref krdi.
Ye baat Husn ko nagawar guzri.
Us ne Mohabat ki ankhen noch le.
Bas us din se Mohabat andhi aur Husn zalim hogaya hai……..New Funny Sms

paani peetaa hoon pipe se Apple khataan hoon knife se Apni bhi kya life hain yaaron Jooten khataa hoon apni wife se!!!

Tute hue khandar ka hissa bana gayi, ghar ko kabad khane ka dibba bana gayi, nikah ke 3 mahine hi guzre the, na jane kis hisab se abba bana gayi

Memon to Shop keeper: Yaar zara toothbrush dena mere brush ka 1 baal toot gaya hai
Dukandar: Aik baal toota to naya q lerahe ho
Memon: jo toota hai woh akhri tha..:

Methi Methi Yadon ko Palko mai saja lena
Sath Guzre Lmho ko Dil mai Bsa lna
mai latren may betha ho poti k lie
bijli ajae to MOTOR yad se chala dena

Dil diya tha MOHABBT ki nishani samajh kar,
Wo kha gaya use BIRYANI samajh kar.
Khoon-e-jiger B na chora zalim ne,
Wo B pi gaya LIMON PANI samajh kar.

Sales man:Khan saab naya powder aaya hai so Cockroaches k liye lelo. . . . Pathan:Na ji na Cockroaches ko itna bhi free nahi karna, Agar aaj powder lekar diya to kal Body Spray maangengy.
Pathan. Agr mere Hath Me hukumat ho to Me MULK ki Tqdeer badaL don. Wife: Tum pehle Apni Shalwar to badal Lo, Subha se meri Shalwar pehn k ghom rahay ho.
Ye keh kr Pathan Ne truck Larkioon pe charha Dia FARAZ, Bachna ae Hasinoo Lo main aa Gaya….
Pathan T.V per bomb rakh kar Pakistan a match daikh raha tha. Bv: ye bomb kis liay rakha hy? Pathan : agar aaj salay haray tu pori team ko bomb sy urra don ga Geo Khan
Ek Pathan Ne Makhi K Par Kaat K Kaha “Urr Ja…” Jab Makhi Nahi Urri To Usney Kaha… “Sabit Hota Hai K Makhi K Par Kaat Diye Jaein To Wo “Behri” Ho Jati Hai.

Ravan- Sigret hai kya?
Hanuman- Nahi
Ram- 1 packet hai na de do.
Hanuman- Aap chup rahiye prabhu.
Saale ke 10 sir hai pura packet khatam kr jayega..!

Ek aadmi ko ye sunkar sadma lag gaya.. Jab uski kaam walli bai ne kha..!!
Sahab! Facebook pe muje bhi add karlo!!

Ramu apne 16 bachho or biwi k sath dost k ghar lunch pe gaya.
Dost ne itni badi family dekh kar gusse mein kaha: Lajja nahi aayee.
Ramu: Nahi uska exam hai…!

Dulhan Andhe Pati se – Kash Tumari Ankhe Hoti to Tum Meri khubsoorati Ko Dekh skte Pati- Agar Tum Khubsurat hoti to kya Ankho wale Tmhe mere liye chod dete.

Boy to girl- Apni body to dekho jaise haddiya hi haddiya ho!
Girl- isliye itni der se soch rahi hu k mere pass Kutta kyo khada hai?

Admi nadi me dub raha tha bola- GaneshJi bachao.
GaneshJi Dance karne lage.
Aadmi- aap nach kyo rahe ho?
Ganesh- mere visarjan me tu bahut nacha!

Girl: Mere erade bade nek hain. Aap 1000 me se ek hain.
Boy: Dimag ke hum bhi don hain. Kameeni pahle ye bata baki k 999 kaun hain.

Ek admi Dr. Se- Aap Parchi Me Aisa Kya Likhte Ho jo Sirf Medical Store Wale Ko Hi Samajh Me aata hai Dr.: main likhta hu…. “Maine Loot Liya Hai Tu Bhi Loot Le..”

Aaj agar aapka SMS ayega to hi hum ROTI khayenge
warna 6 parathe,
panir ki sabzi,
kashmiri pulaw,
ice-cream,
1 glass dudh pikar bhukhe hi so jayenge..!!…..New Funny Sms

SMS Karne ke 4 Fayde he: 1 Mobile ka full use ho jata he, 2 Timepaas ho jata he, 3 Jise SMS karo wo b khush, 4 Kon-kon kanjus he pata chal jata he

PYAR karne se pehle PYAR ka anjam dekh lo…
PYAR karne se pehle PYAR ka anjam dekh lo…
NA YAKIN aaye toh…
Film (TERE NAAM) dekh lo..!

Wife Boli: kuch Saal Pehle Mera Figure PEPSI ki Bottal ki tarah tha. Husband Bola: wo to Ab b hai bas. Pehle Bottle 300ML ki thi Ab 2 litre ki hai

Question: Collage Me Ladkiyo Ke Kitne Naam Hote Hai? Ans: 4 1 Tere Wali 2 Mere Wali 3 Teri bhabhi 4 Meri bhabhi

Pata he hum CHLORMINT kyu khate he..? Kyuki 5-Star Cadbury Perk Dairymilk Kit-Kat or Munch “50 paise me” nahi aati. Ab dubara mat puchna……..New Funny Sms