Funny Jokes Sms

Sharma: Roz subah 25 cute girls mera intezaar karti hain..
verma: Woh kaise?
Sharma: Main Girls College ki Van ka driver hun!!

Gunde ka beta oral exam mein fail ho gaya aur aakar apne baap se bola: Un logon ne 3 ghante tak meri puchtach ki magar apun bhi teri aulad hai, saala kuch bhi nahi bola

Tum paas aae
Yun muskuraye
Apne 32 dant
Mujko dikhaye
Dekh ke mera dil
Phoot Phoot ke rota hai
*
*
Yaar tumse BRUSH bhi
Theek se nahi hota hai

Sardar: Shirt K Liye Badhiya Kapda Dikhana?
SalesMan: PLAIN Me Dikhau?
Sardar: Hawai Jahaaz Tak
Jaane Ki Kya Zarurat Hai?
Yahi Dikha.

Q. Aap me aur Pepsi me kya Similarity hai?
Ans: Both r cool, sweet, Sub pasand karte hai aur most important similarity is
Dimaag wali jagah DHAKAN hai……..Funny Jokes Sms

Me aapko ENGLISH ka 1 word bhejta hu,
Jise aap aage se padho ya pichhe se,
aapko aapka hi naam dikhai dega,
.
.
– U L L U

mard mirch ki tarah tikha aur tej hota hai
Magar mirch kitne bhi tej kyo na ho-aurat uska
achar dal deti hai

Judge-tumhara jurm saabit ho chuka hai kal tumko phasi par
latkaya jayega
Santa-Sir, lekin utara kaab jayega..Dukan bhi to kholni hai

Sardar ji jab exam dene gaye toh woh
apne saath Plumber ko kyun le gaye?
Kyunki Sardarji ko information mili thi
k Paper leak ho gaya hai:

Santa: Aaj men ne 1 jan bachai
Banta: Woh Kaisay?
Santa: Vo aise k ek Faqir ko pucha
1000 ka note dun to kya karega
Wo Bola
Khushi se mar jaunga
Me ne kaha ja nahi deta

;****;
o( @..@ )o
“(—)”
Paichan kaun?
Bandar bi nai,
Monkey bhi nai,
Tumhare bachpan ki photo hai.

Doctor : Apka weight kitna hai?
Patient: Chashme ke sath 75 kgs.
Doctor : Aur bina chashme ke?
Patient: Woh bina chasme ke toh mujhe dikhta hi nahi.

Man to Hotel Manager : Jaldi Chalo, Meri Wife Khirki se kudh kar jaan dena chahti hai.
Manager : So .. Sir What can I Do?
Man : Abey Saale ! Khirki nahi khul rahi………….Funny Jokes Sms

How a woman calls her husband in first 6 years:
Yr 1. Janu
Yr 2. O G.
Yr 3. Aji, sunte ho?
Yr 4. Arey, O Bunty k pappa
And then…..
Yr 5. Kahan mar gaye?
Yr 6. Tum aate ho k main aaon?

1 Over me Kitne Balls Peke Jate hai
Kya apne kaha 6?
Galat jawab
1 over me 1 hi ball 6 bar feka jata he
Bade aye!
Cricket k shokeeeen!

cat:hw old r u?
elpht:5yrs
cat:but u looking big
elpht:i m a complan boy
cat:i m 30yrs
elpht:but u look so smll
cat:i m a jhandu kesri jivan
badhti umar mano tham si jaye

ji karta hai,
apke pas aau,
apke pas aa k zara ruk jau.!!!!!!!!
na bolu, na baithu…
Bus apki ankho me ..
santre ka chilka nichor kr bhag jau.

Baith kr mehbuba ki julfo k saye me aisa josh aya..
wah wah..
wah wah..
fir kya hua??
Wife ne dekh liya aur ICU me hosh aya..

What does ILU means?I= I
L= Love
U=Urdu
so I love urdu…
tum kya samjhey they…I love ullu..
to haan mein tum say bhi pyar karta hoon

Question:What is the fullform of maths.
Anwser: Mentaly affected teachers harrasing students

Ek aadmi apni biwi ka antim sanskar kar ke, Ghar ja raha tha ke achanak bijli, Chamki, Badal garje, Zor se barish shuru hoi, Aadmi bola lagta hai pahunch gai.

Wife:Please bike taze na chalao
mujhey dar lag raha hay. Sardar: Agar tujhy bhi dar lag raha hay
to meri tarah ankhein band kar lay…………….Funny Jokes Sms

Pundit:-Tumhare jeevan me 6 larkian ayengi.
Bow:Wow, kia bat hai.
Pandit:Ziada khush hone ki baat nahin hai.
1 ghar wali or 5 betiyan hain